Tuesday, 14 January 2014

Darlings, You Must All Work Harder to Keep Me Amused (Sestina)

I wrote this to cheer myself up after a day of reading nothing but rubbish on my Facebook newsfeed.  My multi headed love is my name for Facebook, I have written a sonnet and a poem in rhyming couplets to him/her.

You disappoint me everyday, I am
Let down, but feel I can't prevent it,
For I invest so much emotion in
This tool that let's me speak and read, I act
As if my multi headed love were one
Real being with whom I can converse.

I don't know any cure, I can't converse
With people in the flesh, but feel I am
Too full of things to say, to be alone,
But if I have no friends, then why resent it,
This facility for talking, why act
Like a child, why give in

To these bouts of moodiness?  My violin
At its most plangent cannot moan - converse
In tones as sad as my internal dialogue, the act
Of all this moaning and resentment means I am
Just fuelling my misery, but knowing it
Does not prevent it, what is to be done?

And why do I imagine this is to be done?
Ranting at my multi headed love in
Iambs, which do not excuse the deed, it
Is not likely to achieve my aim, the converse
Is more likely and I am
Quite sure that none of you will like my lack of tact.

And I always make excuse after the fact,
Forgive myself my silliness but none
Of you do I forgive for being dull, I am
A hypocrite. And yet the ceaseless din
Of voices of self loathing, who converse,
Attempting thus to undermine my spirit

Recruit my writing to their cause so that complicit
I cannot then retract.
And so my love please try and entertain, converse,
Explain, amuse, but spare the drivel,for we are one,
And like in Heaven we must feed each other, and in
This way avoid the Hell of loneliness - also the need to scream.

There is a deficit of interesting ideas, fill it, imagine none
But you can act in such a way, converse amusingly, and gauge how well you fair, by noticing how happy I am.

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