A Plea

Please don’t nail my testicles to the table,

It’s’s a valuable table and I prize it.

It’s rosewood, 1820 , deep red brown with grain of sable,

And it’s English too, so please do not despise it.

Of course the Regent did admire the Napoleonic style,

So it has a graceful French look about it,

And of course you know, I too, am a mad keen Francophile,

It’s not my balls I care about, don’t doubt it. 

Inspired by this section of an article in The Spectator by Rory Sutherland:

Remainers have almost exclusively made their case on economic grounds, yet in a manner far more fanatical than the businesses they claim to defend. One of the strangest aspects of the Brexit debate is how readily people on the left adopt neo-liberal beliefs about free trade when it supports their emotional predisposition. This may explain why such people have won so few converts; after all, it doesn’t sound convincing to hear leftists suddenly profess passionate concern for global supply-chains. Theirs is an emotional fear disguised as an economic argument; a bit like saying: ‘Please don’t nail my testicles to the table, it’s a very valuable table.’

You can’t help but think: ‘That isn’t your real reason, is it?