Property of a Gentleman

An 18th century oak cupboard,

Nice thing, anyone going to bid?

Come on, it belonged to such a good fellow,

A gentleman, played the cello,

A man with a title,

He once gave a recital

In the village hall,
He raised quite a bit for charity,
Over the years,
Good chap, full of bright ideas,
But he didn’t need money,
So nothing ever came to much.

He used this as a cabinet by his bed,

But his family wanted rid,

Once he was dead,
Well, not dead as such,
Dying

Second marriage, you know how it is,

The wife can’t stand the sight

Of aught that’s his,

And now he’s on his way out

She’s taken a new broom

Come on now, that’s right,
Anyone buying?

Anyone going to give it house room?

It’s quite small,

You could stash your porn in it,

As he did,

And there’s only one shrinkage split.
His first wife was a nice lass,
Pretty, clever, upper class,
Went off,
With some other toff.
I’ll tell you what,
I’ll throw in this regency bedroom chair,

Come on, do I hear two quid?
Two quid anywhere?
Alright, I’ll let it pass.